Life

What is life? To me life is so colorful when there's happiness and becomes grey when all problems arises. I used to be a happy go lucky girl throughout my younger days but problem started after I got married 3 years back.

Before we got married, my hubby is a very caring and responsible man. Money is not a problem to our family. Things got worst after 2 months of married life, my hubby lost his job and argument between us started. With me being pregnant that time, the pressure was all on me where my parents kept nagging and telling me that my hubby is useless as he just rely on his wife after being jobless.

I tolerated knowing that my decision is right, unfortunately he became very impatient and start loosing his temper towards me he even raised him hand on me. I was so hurt and felt that I was betrayed and promises made by him was not been fulfilled.

I decided to go over to Australia to deliver my baby. I find that my relationship between both of us as husband and wife became very far apart, we do not communicate like we used to. But instead we started to have lots of arguments due to financial problem. He became very lazy and refused to work and bear the responsibilities as a husband and as a father.

After an emergency C section to deliver my son, I've made the decision to come back and to give him another chance to work things out. I was surprised that I found him a job and very soon he was back to the work force. But as usual, things wouldn't turn out as what have been planned, he lost his temper in front of his boss and quit the job.

Being me again, I'm trying to help out from every possible ways. Knowing that he wants to start up an own company, being his wife I fully supported him all the way thru. The hardest part was, I quit my job and helped him out full time.

Unexpectedly the responsible of the company falls on me. He started being lazy and goes out late at night and only returns in the morning. I have to see the clients to make sure to bring in businesses and profits to the company. I was getting so frustrated as he does not even help out and demand for his pay.

Life between us and our son was not as expected from what have been planned. We still argues on a very frequent basis. Even my son now who turns 3 this December '08 doesn't really follow his dad. I think kids do really have their own instinct to sense things and evaluate what is right and wrong at a really young age.

I will be flying to Australia again for my second pregnancy. This time I gonna be smart and to start evaluate my husband before making any decision to return back home after my delivery.